Tag: advice

A Life That Matters*

Published on by J. Kelland Perry12 Comments

When I saw the Daily Prompt on WordPress this morning: “What’s a common misconception people have about happiness?”, I couldn’t help but think about a post I made back in 2017. I’m sharing it again because it addresses that question. And with the passage of time, my own opinion has changed somewhat, so I have made a few small updates.

 “It doesn’t matter who we are, what we are doing and what our station in life is, we all have the ability to contribute to something beyond ourselves and (to find) purpose in doing so.” – Emily Esfahani Smith, author of The Power of Meaning: Crafting a Life That Matters.

According to Smith’s research, it isn’t happiness that makes life worth living – it is meaning. It is rising each day with a purpose. As simple and as uncomplicated as that sounds, I wonder how many of us have been chasing the wrong thing.

Is developing a “meaning mindset” the only true answer to achieving fulfillment?

Living on auto-pilot, or chasing mostly what brings you pleasure, or working long and crazy hours, driving yourself to exhaustion to conform to someone else’s definition of success – do any of these pursuits sound like happiness to you?

Or have you already figured this out?

Update: Our purpose, or anything that fulfills us, can change with time; from education to self-expression, from career and to parenthood and beyond. The main thing is, hopefully, whatever endeavour, it gives a measure of satisfaction and meaning.

I think we are all guilty of “living on autopilot” from time to time. Life and its many challenges have a tendency to do that to you. I do believe in the randomness of life, and yet also believe in self-actualization which helps give you a sense of direction, to give those experiences more meaning than ever.

Something has to generate that singular feeling of being alive in a positive way. What will make me happy? But “happiness” is far too vague a goal to me. What passion or purpose will make me feel more alive?

Some of us may take a little longer to figure out what gives meaning to our days. Sometimes, the smallest things can give meaning, and matter a great deal to someone else. A life with purpose would also take us outside ourselves so that we can’t help but take others into account. At least that is my perception of what Smith’s book is telling us.


Have you found your meaning?

*First posted in June 2017

Vivian and her “Pet” Cause

Published on by J. Kelland Perry23 Comments

Good day and welcome,
Friends and Felines!

Vivian here, sitting in as guest host to share a worthy little list with you. I pounced on it during a nighttime prowl on the web and posted it here a few years ago. My sister Maisie and I were animal shelter adoptees, so this is a cause that is naturally near and dear to my kittycat heart.

happy and grateful for being adopted

Have a “purr”-usal and see why I think these are all terrific reasons to bring a lovely little cat like me or a friendly doggie into your heart and home right now. Here’s a bonus reason: with many of us facing a long winter staying home because of the pandemic, a new pet may be just the right antidote for boredom or loneliness.

 
TEN REASONS TO ADOPT A PET FROM A SHELTER

1. Every pet adopted from a shelter instead of purchased from a pet store or breeder improves the pet overpopulation problem.

2. Adopting a dog or cat from a no-kill shelter can free up space for older or special needs pets that may not find new homes before the end of their natural lives.

3. There are plenty of animals to choose from at most shelters. They come in every age, shape, size, coat color and breed mix, and you can find purebreds at shelters as well.

4. Compared to the cost of purchasing a pet, adopting one from an animal shelter is relatively inexpensive. And if you get a slightly older dog or cat, there’s a good chance he is already fully vaccinated and neutered.

5. Adopting an older pet allows you to skip over the time-consuming, often frustrating puppy or kitten stage of development and takes the guesswork out of what your pet will look like as an adult – size, the thickness and color of her coat, and her basic temperament, for example.

6. Most shelters and rescues do assessments on every pet taken in, to determine things like temperament, whether the pet has any aversion to other pets or people, whether he is housebroken, has had obedience training, etc.

7. Many shelters and rescues also offer lots of new owner support and materials about training, behavior problems, nutrition, grooming and general care.

8. If you have kids, adopting a shelter animal can open their eyes to the plight of homeless pets, teach compassion and responsibility, and show them how wonderful it feels to give a home to a pet that might otherwise live in a cage or be euthanized.

9. An older adoptive pet can be the perfect companion for an older person. Many middle-aged and senior dogs and cats require less physical exertion and attention than younger animals.

10. An adopted pet can enrich your life. The unconditional love and loyalty of a dog or cat can lift depression, ease loneliness, lower blood pressure, and give you a reason to get up in the morning. A kitty asleep in your lap feels warm and comforting. A dog that loves to walk or run outdoors can be just the incentive you need to start exercising regularly.

*list adapted from source: healthypets.mercola.com

So if this sharing prompts just one of you to adopt a pet, I have helped an animal in need. And if you share the list, you could too.

“Pets are humanizing. They remind us we have an obligation and responsibility to preserve and nurture and care for all life.” – James Cromwell

***

Vivian shared this list in a 2015 post: Vivian with a Cause

Smile

Published on by J. Kelland Perry

Are You More Creative in the Morning?

Published on by J. Kelland Perry37 Comments

newtown Sunrise
Sunrise in Newtown, Bonavista Bay

Newtown sunrise 2
Ten minutes later

 Research has proven the brain is most actively creative immediately following sleep.

Your subconscious mind wanders and makes connections while you sleep. That is what creativity is – making connections between different parts of the brain.

This makes sense to me. I think my writing is better and more productive in the morning.

Yet I hear some writers and creatives say they are more attuned to creating in the afternoon, evening or night. Is it simply a matter of being a morning person or a night owl?

Still others say they have no choice but to write whenever they can find the time.

When do you do your best creative work?

Beating Myself Up Over The Gossipers

Published on by J. Kelland Perry44 Comments

Les chuchoteuses (English: “The Gossipers”) is a 2002 bronze outdoor sculpture by Rose-Aimée Bélanger installed along Montreal’s Rue Saint-Paul, in Quebec, Canada.

I took the above photo ten years ago on my second visit to the beautiful city of Montreal. I’ve been beating myself up ever since for cutting off the middle gossiper’s toes!

Here’s a pic of the full sculpture from Wikipedia, toes and all:

Perhaps I should take the advice of this quote:

“Don’t beat yourself up for not being perfect. But you might want to kick your own ass
if you’re not trying to get better.” – Hal Elrod

By the way, I stopped beating myself over real gossipers a long time ago. 🙂

A Valentine from Vivian

Published on by J. Kelland Perry21 Comments

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I know you may think
that I look kind of lazy
But not every day
I’m as fresh as a daisy

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Precious few are so perfect
to wear halos above us
So we look past the faults
of who we love and who love us

Like where did this dog toy
come from, we inquire
When there are gorgeous kitty cats
here to admire?

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But I won’t dwell on that,
just an oversight, maybe
I’ll forgive and forget
and not act like a baby

And we won’t envy Jennifer
with her life that’s just ducky
‘Cause we know of a time
when she wasn’t so lucky

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So don’t be concerned
if you haven’t seen Cupid
Don’t be down on romance
because that would be stupid

Just realize your True Love
may not be that far
And besides,
you are wonderful
just as you are!

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If you still find you’re sad
and alone on this day
Take a look at our cuteness
to chase troubles away

And please, pretty please,
know we love you like crazy
Happy Valentine kisses
from me and from Maisie. ❤

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The Daily Post Prompt:
Cupid’s Arrow – Write an ode to someone or something you love. Bonus points for poetry!

This was my first time using the new “Copy a Post” feature on WordPress for evergreen content. Originally shared in 2015 here.

Today a reader…

Published on by J. Kelland Perry18 Comments

Please encourage your children to read.

Give them books they would enjoy for Christmas.

Take them to the public library to get their own library card.

If they are too young to read themselves, read them bedtime stories.

It’s never too early to inspire a love of good books. No, they won’t all become leaders, but research shows that reading to children and discussing the book is the best way to increase your child’s IQ and instill a love of reading.

10 Ways for Parents to Encourage Their Child to Read

Blogger Bouquet #53

Published on by J. Kelland Perry

wordpress blogger bouquet

I was pleased this month to discover Milly Schmidt and her blog, The Cat’s Write.

A writer and a cat person – could I have picked a better blogger to follow?

From her About page:

“I’m a writer, blogger and crazy cat lady living in the New England, Australia. Some bloggers mistakenly think I’m from the New England in the US, but I really don’t mind, any way to bond is fine by me!

I’m currently working on my first crime novel, When She Goes, a psychological thriller set in rural NSW. When not writing or blogging, I work in the human resources sector and I have a Bachelor of Criminology from the University of New England. I am also a member of the New England Writers’ Centre and the Australian Crime Writers Association.”

I’m sharing a post where Milly tells about an exceptionally mean rejection letter she received for an article she submitted to one of her favourite online writing magazines. That same article that was criticized, 9 reasons why you should self-publish, went on to become one of the most popular she has ever written.

The Subjective Nature of the Creative World

Comments are closed here but you can leave a comment on the blogger’s page.

Have an inspired weekend, everyone.
❤

Blogger Bouquet #50

Published on by J. Kelland Perry

Raimey Gallant is a Canadian writer I recently discovered here on WordPress through the Insecure Writers Support Group.

From her Welcome page:

“I’m an activisty, feministy, world-traveling, wannabe comedian who writes crime thrillers and YA contemporary…I’m also a marketing and fundraising consultant, and zumba champ.”

Raimey’s blog includes a collection of tips and tricks on the craft of writing, as well as advice on the marketing side of writing. If you’re a writer, you just might want to follow her too!

Here’s a helpful article on the creation of a fictional villain:

Five Ways to Find Inspiration for the Next Great Villain

Comments are closed here but you can leave one on the blogger’s page.

Have a great weekend, everyone.
❤

The Cutest Ornament?

Published on by J. Kelland Perry27 Comments

Our grandkitten Joey is going to be the cutest ornament on the tree this Christmas – that is if and only if the tree survives his yuletide antics!

My daughter (who snapped this pic) said the little rascal climbed to the top in under half a minute, and in the space of twenty minutes he climbed it eight times.

Readers: Any pet pointers for this pressing pussycat problem ?
Please post below!