funny – Jennifer's Journal

As anyone with a blog or a website knows, people online can find or happen upon our blogs using a variety of search terms. Some of those terms that have popped up on my blog admin section are logical and understandable, some are pretty strange, and still some others are downright funny.

I’ll start with a few of the logical search terms. My followers – at least the minuscule few who’ve visited since the beginning – will understand how these terms led searchers to Jennifer’s Journal:

Jennifer Kelland Perry, Jennifer Kelland – moi, the most logical
cats at the ocean
cat ice
tentative cat
cats exploring – yes indeedy, you will find cats, ocean and ice here
Newtown, Newfoundland – where?
Maisie and Vivian – and what are the cats’ names?

Cats on Ice – Spring Thaw in Iceberg Alley

Then the cat theme begins to get humorous:

behold my French feline eyes - oo-la-la — behold my French feline eyes – oo-la-la

cat on an iceberg
fancy words for purr
jennifer with cat eyes
jennifer feline eyes
french jennifer cat eyes

Some other topics are right on the money:

polar bears in Newfoundland – a popular topic, only once for this blog
speciesism rant – one of my very few rants
pictures of patch quilt on clothesline – beautiful Greenspond
little boy working on car – our grandson
you are my one and only blog – ❤
first date journal – ❤
Jennifer in varadero – Cuba!
heart turned cold quotes – I did pen a dark poem once…
journaling about bitterness – okay, twice!
reasons of dreams and meaning of dreams, see sleeping mouse in dream – because I put the word dream in a couple of my titles, I’m guessing
menopause feel like a furnace, perry menopause symptoms, hot flash journaling, internal combustion menopause – a topic of great concern out there, apparently, though I only blogged about it once
very cute images of love peace and understanding – but all they found were Nick Lowe and Elvis Costello!
Jennifer’s progress – my novel, the sequel? inquiring minds want to know
famous Jennifers in fiction – not me, but…maybe…someday?

Still giggling at the rest below. You will not find anything about the following topics in my blog:

having guy visitors in winter – shhh, don’t tell Paul!
cat foot ptarmigan – a new cross-breed?
scarlet woman – just call me the whore of Babylon
iceberg smelling – hold on: is that a thing??
Jennifer is a racist blog – yikes! I swear you’ve got the wrong blog!

And my personal favourite:

Jennifer Kelland Perry the platypus

Turns out there is an explanation for this one.
I just learned about this fellow when I did a search.

And there you have it. Someone looking for a platypus found me.

Have any funny or odd search terms from your blog to share?
Fess up in the comments below. 🙂

This morning I read a funny post by 40 is the new 13, a fellow blogger, on how children make crazy assumptions based on their own brand of logic, such as dogs are boys and cats are girls.

It sparked a memory for me. It wasn’t of an assumption one of my kids made, but a memory of what my son said one day when he was in grade two. I think it would be considered a malapropism.

Above is a pic I took of my boy back in the day, waiting for the school bus on his first day of kindergarten. When he got to second grade, his teacher, Mrs. Snow, was a kind and lovely young woman, and all the children adored her.

One day, when my little boy was nearing the end of that school year, he got off the bus and came home with an interesting piece of news. My friend and I were chatting over coffee when he entered the kitchen. He dropped his book bag and announced,

“Guess what? Mrs. Snow isn’t going to be a grade two teacher anymore.”

“No?” I asked, curious. “Is she giving up teaching already?” It seemed odd because she was nowhere near the age of retirement. “Oh, she’s going to teach a different grade, is she?”

“No,” he said. “She’s going to be a prostitute teacher.”

I nearly choked on my coffee, while my friend tried in vain to suppress her laughter.

Now the first thing I did was gently correct him. “You must mean substitute teacher, honey.”

The next thing I thought was, where did he hear that word? It wasn’t a word that was bandied about in our household. It wasn’t like he was living in a bordello, or that we let him watch a steady stream of TV shows like Hill Street Blues or Spencer for Hire. And I sure as heck couldn’t imagine it as a topic of conversation among him and the other kids around his age. How did this word get into his vocabulary?

To this day, the answer remains a mystery.

Another one I liked was when my niece asked for a “girl-cheese” sandwich. Even when her mother corrected her, she continued to say it.

“It’s my cheese sandwich. And I’m a girl, right?”

Did you have any “verbal typos” to share from your childhood, or from one of your own kids?

(Of course, you don’t need to be a kid to say the darndest thing. The other day I called a take-out restaurant and asked if they had any “pressure-treated” chicken. I’m still shaking my head over that one. 😉 )

More fun reading:
Dogs are boys, Cats are girls