This morning I read a funny post by 40 is the new 13, a fellow blogger, on how children make crazy assumptions based on their own brand of logic, such as dogs are boys and cats are girls.
It sparked a memory for me. It wasn’t of an assumption one of my kids made, but a memory of what my son said one day when he was in grade two. I think it would be considered a malapropism.
Above is a pic I took of my boy back in the day, waiting for the school bus on his first day of kindergarten. When he got to second grade, his teacher, Mrs. Snow, was a kind and lovely young woman, and all the children adored her.
One day, when my little boy was nearing the end of that school year, he got off the bus and came home with an interesting piece of news. My friend and I were chatting over coffee when he entered the kitchen. He dropped his book bag and announced,
“Guess what? Mrs. Snow isn’t going to be a grade two teacher anymore.”
“No?” I asked, curious. “Is she giving up teaching already?” It seemed odd because she was nowhere near the age of retirement. “Oh, she’s going to teach a different grade, is she?”
“No,” he said. “She’s going to be a prostitute teacher.”
I nearly choked on my coffee, while my friend tried in vain to suppress her laughter.
Now the first thing I did was gently correct him. “You must mean substitute teacher, honey.”
The next thing I thought was, where did he hear that word? It wasn’t a word that was bandied about in our household. It wasn’t like he was living in a bordello, or that we let him watch a steady stream of TV shows like Hill Street Blues or Spencer for Hire. And I sure as heck couldn’t imagine it as a topic of conversation among him and the other kids around his age. How did this word get into his vocabulary?
To this day, the answer remains a mystery.
Another one I liked was when my niece asked for a “girl-cheese” sandwich. Even when her mother corrected her, she continued to say it.
“It’s my cheese sandwich. And I’m a girl, right?”
Did you have any “verbal typos” to share from your childhood, or from one of your own kids?
(Of course, you don’t need to be a kid to say the darndest thing. The other day I called a take-out restaurant and asked if they had any “pressure-treated” chicken. I’m still shaking my head over that one. 😉 )
More fun reading:
Dogs are boys, Cats are girls
Jennifer's Journal 
Hahaha…Kids and Adults at times, do say the Darnedest Things !! …..love your writing…. 🙂
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Thanks, but I wish I knew who you were!
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I remember when a family friend was a little kid, he was getting ready to go to the school disco. “Here you go,” said his Mum handing him some coins, “it costs $2 to get in”
“How much does it cost to get out?” he asked.
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Ha ha, funny! Guess he didn’t think he’d like the disco scene.
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That’s a really funny story!
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I got a lot of mileage out of it over the years. 🙂
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My mind still works like that. Even sometimes when I know the difference.
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Sometimes that is how a malapropism comes out, as a slip of the tongue. Thank you for your comment. 🙂
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Funny that we both wrote about children this week!
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I just read and commented on your post. Thanks for dropping by!
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That’s really funny Jen. I’ve always loved that pic of him, he’s so cute in it.
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Thanks, Lynda. 🙂
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A student of mine who was in yr 7 at the time was doing an assigmment on Brazil. He wrote about the erotic fruits they have in their country.
Kelly ♡
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Ha ha, love it. I’d like to sample some of those fruits. 🙂
Thanks for stopping by with your comment, Kelly.
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Oh Jennifer my boy only the other day was singing an Elvis song “A little less constipation”, Im not sure what the real words were but somehow think he got it a tad wrong. How cute is your son all those years ago.
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That’s hilarious, Kath! But I do admire his music taste, I love that song. 🙂
My boy is pretty cute in the pic, isn’t he? Thanks.
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Out of the mouths of babes. 🙂
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I was going to use that phrase, Elizabeth, but changed my mind. 🙂 Thanks for dropping in!
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Jennifer, I still remember that day! I still tell that story occasionally and the result is always the same hilarious laughter! I am so glad that you are sharing it with others so they can enjoy a chuckle.
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Oh Nikki, we will never forget that moment! Really takes you back, doesn’t it? I hope he doesn’t mind me blogging about it. 😀
Thanks for commenting…x
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Oh my lol. That reminds me of a story as well, but I will be nice and not repeat it here. Thank you for sharing:) That made my morning.
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Aw, now you’ve got me wondering what that story is. Anyway, glad I made you laugh, Ionia!
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Preasure treated chicken – hahaha! In German, ashtray is ashenbercher, apparently I said apple becher and my dad swears I said flutterby rather than butterfly, yet if you think it about it, flutterby makes more sense anyway!
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Flutterby makes perfect sense! You’re no fool, Diana. 😉
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haha! I knew it! 🙂
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