Friday Fiction – A Special Guest

Jenniferโ€™s Friday Fiction

I’m pleased today to feature a special guest post on Friday Fiction.

My 12 year-old granddaughter Leah wrote the following flash fiction piece for school recently. When her mom showed it to me, I liked it so much, I asked Leah if she would allow me to publish it here on my blog.

Our family’s budding new writer readily agreed. Friends and followers, please take a moment to read it and tell me what you think!

roller coaster ride

Bart, the security guard, has always loved his job at the amusement park. He loves the greasy smell of deep-fried onions and the sweet smell of cotton candy drifting in the breeze as people happily skip by.

But there was just one thing that made Bart sad. He would always see people of all ages having so much fun with huge smiles on their faces as they jumped with excitement. Bart looked down at his chubby belly sticking out under his uniform with grease stains all over it from his recent lunch break. “I wish I could ride one of the roller coasters,” Bart thought to himself. All he wanted was to be able to ride a roller coaster and know what it was like to be happy and have fun.

Bart decided to make a plan. Maybe he could sneak onto a ride. No one would notice he was gone from his post because no one ever noticed he was there. Except for Trevor.

Trevor was Bart’s very strict boss. If Trevor ever found out about Bart’s plan, he would fire him for good and Bart definitely did not want that to happen. But he wanted to ride a roller coaster so bad, he was willing to take the chance.

Late one day, Bart was ready for action. It was 9:00 pm and the park closed at 10:00 pm. It was dark out so he wouldn’t be seen as easily. Bart slipped off his uniform so that he was left with a T-shirt and a pair of shorts on. He quickly put on his ball cap and ran off to the scariest ride in the park called “The Brain Wash”.

Bart got in line. While everyone was passing their tickets to the tall man standing at the entrance, Bart squeezed past the man without being seen. Bart had made it through!

He was finally on the ride. As the roller coaster was going up the steep hill with a ticking sound, he looked down at everyone below. They all looked like little ants. But there was one face that Bart could pick out. It was Trevor looking up at him with his arms folded across his chest. What if Bart got fired from his job?

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29 thoughts on “Friday Fiction – A Special Guest

  1. Congratulations to your granddaughter, Jennifer!๐Ÿ˜€ Leah has nailed the Flash Fiction story – this is brilliant. I’m drawn in straightaway by Bart and the small details such as ‘greasy smell of deep-fried onions and the sweet smell of cotton candy’ paint a vivid picture of the fairground. She quickly gets into the mind of the guard and lets us listen to his longing to go on the ride. Then, wow, brilliant finish leaving us hungry to know more! Well done … Leah has a natural flair for writing! ๐Ÿ˜€

    Liked by 1 person

  2. What a great story, Leah! You did a wonderful job in creating a sympathetic character with Bart. Now I’m dying to know what happened once he got off the roller coaster! Thanks for sharing your granddaughter talent with us, Jennifer.

    Liked by 1 person

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