For My Mother

Published on by J. Kelland Perry

Last month was my mother’s birthday.  She turned 75.

For the first time in her seventy-five years, our dear mother wasn’t able to eat any birthday cake.  She is bedridden, in and out of consciousness on morphine, and dying.  There is every reason to expect – and actually, dare I say, hope – that this is the year of her last birthday, and that her painful battle with Alzheimer’s disease will finally be over.

Mom has taken a turn this past week, a turn that plants her squarely in the final stage of this heartbreaking disease. She can no longer swallow even liquid food, so we know the end is near.

I can hardly think of anything or anyone else right now. I dread what lies ahead, even though I said above that I hope this, her last trial, will soon be at its end.

Here is a poem I wrote over twenty five years ago, when my mom and I were much younger women. I made some changes, updating it to reflect the present, but the essential message remains the same. I love you, Mom!

Mother

When I needed someone to hug
You were there
Your arms outstretched and waiting, your gentle, warm embrace
Absorbing all my love.

When I felt the pain of problems
You were close by
Your soft, smooth cheek was soothing, your warm familiar bosom
Blotting out the fears.

When we begged a little comfort
From each other, over the years
With a love so unconditional, as one woman to another,
We shared our tears.

And now,
When you have reached completion
Of this, your final trial,
I will treasure precious moments, tender memories, my sweet haven
Because, Mom,

When I needed someone to love,
You were there.

36 thoughts on “For My Mother”

  2. A wonderful and poignant message from a loving daughter. Your mother was blessed to have a child who loved her so very much. My mom has dementia and I know the pain of watching your loved one pass away bit by bit….so I understand when you say “dare I say hope” about the last birthday. It is understandable. God bless and thank you for your post and also for your comment on my blog.

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    1. Thank you for your kind words. I am so sorry for what you are going through with your own mother…such a cruel disease that hurts the family in ways that can’t be described.
      Your blog is very interesting, and a wealth of knowledge, and I am now following. Thanks for stopping by with your comments.

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  5. Jennifer beautiful tribute and poem to your Mother, it never gets any easier, we miss them more each year, My mother is my rock, yet my father lost his battle with cancer a few years back, at christmas we raise our glass in memory of all those we cherish and miss, my thoughts are with you.

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  8. Pingback: My First Anniversary…and Ten Things I Didn’t Know When I Started | Jennifer's Journal

  10. It is with a heavy heart that I mourn the loss of my beautiful mother, but I take comfort in the thought that she is finally reunited with Dad, the love of her life.
    I am touched by all of these comments, as well as the many calls, messages, and visits. Thank you all so much. xo

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  11. Jennifer, you Lynn and Jeff are in my thoughts. I am sad to think that Aunt Carrie is gone. I am also thankful that she did not have to endure this awful illness any longer. She was always very special to me. Love, Dorie

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  12. jen that is a beautiful poem my thoughts go out to you as we were good friends i know how you feel as i loss my mom threw cancer its not easy but with friends and family youll get threw it if theres anything we can do let us know we r thinking of you and the family please keep us in informed
    you know well’ll be there for you .

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  13. Jen. I can only imagine what you are going through. she and your dad were such special friends of ours.. we have such beautiful memories of both of them, I cried as I read your blog, I lost my mom at age nine so I never got to have that special bond which I know you both had. all of you were so special to her and your dad. I have lots of beautiful pictures to cherish, fun times, and that’s how I will remember her,,,stay strohg Jen as she will be with your dad ,whom I don’t think she ever got over losing .. she would not want to linger here like that…cherish your memories and may God cradle her in His Arms till we all meet again…keep me posted as we are in AB..

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  14. Jennifer….A beautiful poem to honor a beautiful lady!! I will be thinking of you & your family and praying that you will gain strength from each other to endure the days that lie ahead. Take care.

    Carol

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  15. Our thoughts and prayers are with you Jennifer. We pray that your dear mother will have great comfort in having her loving family around her. We also pray for peace during this time. Carrie is a very loving person. God bless everyone.

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  16. Just beautiful Jen, made me cry. I can only imagine how hard this has to be for you all. I’ve always loved your Mom as well and am very saddened about how her life has to end with this horrible disease. I’m sending hugs and good thoughts your way as you continue on this very difficult journey. Lots of Love! ox

    Lynda

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  19. This brought tears to my eyes too. Jennifer you have been lucky to have the special bond with your mom. She, in turn, has been lucky to have such a loving and appreciative daughter. Keep those happy memories with you always, its part of what makes you the wonderful person you are. Hope the journey gets easier and relief is found from all this misery. Sending hugs and prayers for strength your way. Karen.

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  20. Jennifer I know this is a hard time for you and our family.Watching dad die took the good right out of me so I know what you are going though.I also know we have the same thing facing us with mom.Keep us posted on aunt Carrie.luv ya xoxo

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    1. Thank you, Suzanne. Yes, we went through similar experiences with our dads, and now our moms. So sad, but I feel truly blessed to have had them for our parents. I will keep you updated. Love you too. XO

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  21. This is so Beautiful…Sending Love and Prayers to you and your family, as you travel with your Mom on her journey home..to reunite with your Dad…..May God Give You All The Strength You Need…To Help You In The Days Ahead…..Hugs

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  23. a really sweet poem.. may god give your mom strength.. i can understand the pain you are going through..i almost lost my mom to a paralytic attack once..but all thanks to god, she survived.
    hugs and prayers!!

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    2. Jennifer your poem that you wrote for your Mom is beautiful. It does bring tears when I think of Aunt Carrie and the decline in her health and about how very hard this is on all of you. Love to you and Lynn and Jeff and family.xoxo

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